Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Live Blogging: ERP Training (and other minor rants)

Insert row; view history; effective dating; set ID; it’s a relational database; that’s covered in another training; business rules; workflows (insert wha-wha-wha sound of Charlie Brown’s teacher here)…

OK, I’m fucking with you. I won’t subject you to the joy that is preparing for a new Enterprise Resource Planning (E-R-P, but I like to say erp, as in burp) software implementation. Last week I was in nearly 40 hours of planning workshops (plus all of the *regular* work, and no I didn’t get to go to the forced merriment that is the company summer picnic) and this week I’m in the first round of training with 8 hours a day of mind-numbing training. The good news is that my lunch hours have been spent in contract negotiations for a different portion of the project. Some times I see my life as a collection of poor choices.

In other news, I see that the current president (to use Ms. Vowell’s terminology) is opening up oil reserves to help with Katrina’s aftermath. That makes sense, that’s what the reserves are there for, right? It’s like a national emergency. Embroiled in a $200 Billion quagmire? Try this. Develop pseudo-compassionate subterfuge after disaster hits the red states. This isn’t to take away from the tragedy, but I find it interesting that one of the FEMA fuck-knuckles (Joe Allbaugh, who looks like another fuck-knuckle, Bernard Kerik) was telling Iowa residents that if the Mississippi floods their area again, the government shouldn’t have to pay for it. Bullshit. So, live in hurricane alley and help us show our compassionate side and provide subterfuge, but if you live in blue state, fuck you.

Tangent alert. So, a plucky young kid is running for the 10th ward seat in Minneapolis. The pro: his name is Harry Savage and his slogan, run with the Harry Savage. The con: He wants to bring "Giuliani-style" justice to minor and major crime in Minneapolis. I suppose that means more broomsticks for the police departments and if you’re a minority, for the love of God, don’t waive your wallet in the air. My support is behind Ralph Remington
Finally, no reactions to my Matilda Joslyn Gage comment regarding Elise’s 19th amendment post. C’mon people?!?

The White Sox are starting to stumble under the weight of nearly ninety years of futility. Do they have the guts to win, or will they piss down their leg in September?

OK, now it’s time to prepare for training. Just a little pinprick. There'll be no more ...Aaaaaahhhhh!