Jokes with a Narrow Appeal

I know that there are at least a few MIAC-school alums out there, so...

How many MIAC students does it take to change a light bulb?

-At Carleton, it takes two. One to change the bulb and one more to explain how they did it every bit as well as any Ivy Leaguer.

-At Hamline, it takes three. One to change the bulb and two to phone a friend at St. Thomas to get instructions.

-At Macalester, it takes four. One to screw in the bulb and three to figure out how to get high off the old one.

-At St. Mary's, it takes five. One to change it and four to talk about how they would have done it in Chicago.

-At Gustavus, it takes six. One to change it, two to mix the drinks and three to find the perfect "J. Crew" outfit to wear for the occasion.

-At Augsburg, it takes seven and each one gets four semester credit hours for it.

-At St. Thomas, they hire graduates from other MIAC schools to do jobs such as this.

-At St. John's, it takes eight. One to screw it in and seven to discuss how much brighter it shines during football season.

-At Concordia, it takes ten. One to figure out how to screw it in, nine to find an ugly enough lampshade to match their school colors.

-At St. Olaf, it takes 100. One to change it, 49 to talk about how they do it better than Carleton, and 50 who realize it's all a lie.

-At Bethel, it takes none. They don't screw.