Say "Yah!" to da U.P., Eh?

My mom and dad have both now sent me stories about how the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, from whence I came, is on a list of the top 10 summer destinations, alongside such locales as Capri, the Hamptons, London, and Russia.

10. Upper Peninsula, Michigan
If city-living gets too hot, pack up some marshmallows, hot dogs and camping gear and head to the refreshing Upper Peninsula of Michigan, where majestic wildlife, unspoiled rivers, waterfalls and dense forests abound. Blessed with some 1700 miles of shoreline along three of the Great Lakes—Superior, Michigan and Huron—it should come as no surprise that fishing, canoeing, and camping are prime activities here, with moose, bears, and beavers as common companions. The region's strong Native American and French Canadian heritage are experienced everywhere as well; enclaves with names like Sault Ste-Marie and bridges like the Mackinac hearken back to the days of the earliest settlers. You'll probably feel like one of North America's earliest explorers yourself as you paddle the waterways here and set up camp in the woods.

Now, this isn't the best precis of the U.P. I've ever seen: Finns, Italians, and Slovaks outnumber the "French-Canadians" in most of the region. (I'd guess the writer visited the easternmost quarter of the peninsula, wedged in between the Lower Peninsula and Ontario.) But yeah, the U.P. is probably (along with the Boundary Waters area in Minnesota) probably the wildest, least touched area of the Midwest, and maybe of the the entire U.S. east of the Mississippi and north of the Mason-Dixon. In short, I'm all for better publicity for the U.P., and for more tourism. I'd go up there once a month, if I could. But that's the damn trouble: unless you live in Duluth or Green Bay, the U.P. is a loooong way off. My hometown, Hancock, is 269 miles from Minneapolis, 362 miles from Chicago, and 429 miles from Detroit. And Detroit and Hancock are supposedly in the same state.

You can't take an interstate to the U.P. Flights are few, infrequent, and costly. And you can only ski or snowmobile to it for six months out of the year, tops. All in all, this son of the North thinks you're better off going to Scandinavia (no. 9 on the list): it's got the same topography and architecture, similar(ly weird) food and outdoor activities, funnier accents and better music, and it's a hell of a lot easier to get there. But either way, send me a postcard!