Panic in the Streets of Hancock

From my hometown paper comes this article on a big effort to record kids' fingerprints, DNA, and dental impressions so that, as one ten-year-old heartbreakingly says, "in case I get lost or stolen, they’ll be able to identify me.” For "me," read, "my corpse," since what other purpose would this have?

I know these parents (and the cops and the sponsors) mean well, but this project strikes me as a horrifying exercise in preparing for an extremely unlikely disaster. Want to keep your kids safe? Rather than actually induce fear in them by making it seem that the bogeyman's about to snatch them from their yards, make sure they wear bike helmets and don't eat too much junk food.