Does the Escalade Have a Stick Shift?

I feel, readers, like my fellow After School Snackers have let me and all of you down. No, not because they post far less frequently than I do (that fact is balanced by the quality of their posts), but because none of them - not even Matt, with his supremely well-tuned radar for idiotic athletes - has yet blogged about Minnesota Timberwolf Eddie Griffin, who in March was arrested for crashing his Escalade into a Minneapolis grocery store while masturbating to a porn video (or two).

I hadn't even heard of this until I got back in to the fine sports blog Deadspin, which last summer covered the incident in some detail and just posted about Griffin's recent plea of guilty to "inattentive driving." I'd say.