Office Dares

A little giggle for your Thursday, from my friend Maggie, who notes that she already has, "like, 23 points." How many points can YOU get?

ONE-POINT DARES
1 - Run one lap around the office at top speed.
2 - Groan out loud in the toilet cubicle (at least one other 'non-player' must be in the toilet at the time.
3 - Ignore the first five people who say 'good morning' to you.
4 - Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name and say, "Just called to say I can't talk right now. Bye."
5 - To signal the end of a conversation, clap your hands over your head.
6 - When someone hands you a piece of paper, finger it, and whisper huskily, "Mmmmmmm, that feels soooooo good!"
7 - Leave your zipper open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say, "Sorry, I really prefer it this way."
8 - Walk sideways to the photocopier.
9 - While riding an elevator, gasp dramatically every time the doors open.

THREE-POINT DARES
1 - Say to your boss, "I like your style" and shoot him with double-barreled fingers.
2 - Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask, "Did you get all that, I don't want to have to repeat it".
3 - Kneel in front of the water cooler / sink and drink directly from the nozzle (there must be a 'non-player' within sight).
4 - Shout random numbers while someone is counting.

FIVE POINT DARES
1 - At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra points if you actually launch into it yourself).
2 - Walk into a very busy person's office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.
3 - For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as "Bob."
4 - Announce to everyone in a meeting that you "really have to go do a number two."
5 - After every sentence, say 'mon' in a really bad Jamaican accent - As in "the report's on your desk, mon." Keep this up for one hour.
6 - While an office mate is out, move their chair into the elevator.
7 - In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead repeatedly and mutter, "Shut up, damn it, all of you just shut up!"
8 - At lunchtime, get down on your knees and announce, "As God is my witness, I'll never go hungry again."
9 - In a colleague's calendar, write in 10am: "See how I look in tights."
10 - Carry your keyboard over to your colleague and ask "You wanna trade?"
11 - Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."
12 - Come to work in army fatigues and when asked why, say, "I can't talk about it".
13 - Posing as a maitre d', call a colleague and tell him he's won a lunch for four at a local restaurant. Let him go.
14 - Speak with an accent (French, German, Porky Pig, etc) - during a conference call.
15 - Find the vacuum and start vacuuming around your desk.
16 - Hang a two-foot long piece of toilet roll from the back of your pants and act genuinely surprised when someone points it out.
17 - Present meeting attendees with a cup of coffee and donut, then smash each donut with your fist.
18 - During the course of a meeting, slowly edge your chair towards the door.
19 - Arrange toy figures on the table to represent each meeting attendee, move them according to the movements of their real-life counterparts.